My Hope Is In You

As I sit down to write this blog entry, I realize that it has been almost exactly one year since my last post.  What in the world has happened? . . . LIFE!  Within the last year, I continued teaching, working on my Graduate Degree, and spending time being a devoted wife & aunt.  All to which I added the addition of becoming a coach.  My husband and I now coach the local high school ski team together and we're sure that God wants us to be reaching these kids.  On the flipside, such a great responsibility brings about countless hours of organization, reflection, stress, and busyness.

I'm not making excuses; in fact, I am admitting that nothing in life should be an excuse for growing distant from the Lord.  Unfortunately, this is exactly what I allowed to happen.  Another momentous event this year was that a close coworker of mine was diagnosed with inoperable cancer.  The news has devastated our school and community.

While many of us are struggling with the news of her diagnosis, she is a testament to God's grace in how she is handling the events.  Her faith, strength, and peace are admirable.  Upon reflecting, I realized that I need to rely on God as surely as my coworker is.  I was reminded of my need to put my hope in him.   

Psalm 91:2 (NIV) I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."

This scripture verse is a reminder of how our trust, our faith, and our hope needs to be in God.  It can't be satisfied by being busy, being successful, building relationships, or anything else in this world.  Nothing in our lives can replace the sense of fulfillment that we receive from a strong relationship with Christ. 

He is our refuge.  He our sustainer and healer.  He is our Lord.

As I was reflecting about my dear coworker and sending off a card to her in the mail, I found this song on the internet.  It's funny how God can bring something to you at just the right time.  It has been playing nonstop on my laptop since I heard it. 

My Hope Is In You by Aaron Shust    I meet with You and my soul sings out as Your word throws doubt far away.  I sing to You and my heart cries, "Holy! Hallelujah!  Father, You're near!"  My hope is in You, Lord, all the day long.  I won't be shaken by drought or storm.  A peace that passes understanding is my song and I sing My hope is in You, Lord.  I wait for You and my soul finds rest.  In my selfishness, You show me grace.  I worship You and my heart cries, "Glory!  Hallelujah!  Father, You're here!"  My hope is in You, Lord, all the day long.  I won't be shaken by drought or storm.  A peace that passes understanding is my song and I sing My hope is in You, Lord.  I will wait on You.  You are my refuge.  My hope is in You, Lord. 

This song and scripture verse are testaments of our need to put all of our hope in Him.  When we give Him our all, He gives us a peace that we can't even comprehend.  Even though it's hard to remember when we are bombarded with all the distractions in our lives, it's the only way to survive.   

Everlasting God

Lately, I have been searching and wishing for a roadmap for my life.  I want to know where I'm going and exactly what is coming next for me.  Wouldn't it be great if we could be totally prepared for the journey? 

Well, we are completely prepared...when we put our trust in God.  See the sacrifice?  It's putting our trust in Him, not in ourselves. 
Even when things are busy and overwhelming, He is in control.  When things are frustrating, He is calm.  And when we can't do it anymore, He is there. 

Psalm 25:10 (NLT) The Lord leads with unfailing love and faithfulness all who keep His covenant and obey his demands.

With all the craziness in my life, it is hard to put my faith in someone other than myself.  I try my best to get things done and to make things go the way I think that they should....but when is there time to sleep?  I can't do it on my own! 

I am in complete awe of the fact that God is always there and is in perfect control of this world.  He is in control of our jobs, our families, our fears, and our hearts.  We need to constantly remind ourselves to give Him our trust.  He is, after all, a truly faithful God. 
God is faithful through the storms and the sun, through the tears and the smiles, through whatever it is that you are facing right now.  He is Everlasting.

Everlasting God by New Life Worship     One thing I know that I have found, through all the troubles that surround: You are the Rock that never fails. You never fail. One thing I know that I believe, through every blessing I receive: You are the only One that stays. You always stay. You never change. You're still the same. You are the Everlasting God. You will remain after the day is gone and the things of earth have passed. Everlasting God. One thing I know that I have found, through all the troubles that surround: You are the Rock that never fails. You never fail. You never change. You're still the same. You are the Everlasting God. You will remain after the day is gone and the things of earth have passed. Everlasting God.

Healing Begins

This past weekend was Memorial Day Weekend and was -- as always -- filled with picnics, friends, and family.  The weekend was also filled with God's power and Spirit!

Right now, with everything going on in my life, all I can do is thank God for His unending faithfulness.  The Lord has been working in my family's life and it is hard to describe how I'm feeling at this point in time.  God is calling my husband and I to work for Him in a way that we were not expecting at this moment.  We are excited for what God has in store for us, but also sad about ending our service at our current church.  All we can do is trust that He is in control: of our hearts, our futures, and our feelings.  

Psalm 103:1-5 (NLT)   Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise His holy name.  Let all that I am praise the Lord, may I never forget the good things he does for me.  He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases...He fills my life with good things.  My youth is renewed like the eagle's!

Even though things are going according to God's plan, that's not to say that some things don't still hurt.  My feelings and emotions have been heightened through the ups and downs of the weekend's events.  In the midst of all of my inner emotional struggles, God spoke to me during a worship service.  I was reminded of this song by Tenth Avenue North as I sat in a church pew and cried.

God reminded me that I have to give everything over to Him.  I can't just trust Him with some parts of my life, I have to let all of my walls down and let Him be in control of everything!  

It has been so long since I have truly laid down all of myself to the Lord.  I had been trying to keep up appearances, be confident in my own strength, and act like I had everything together.  God reminded me that, through whatever may come, I need to give myself up to His control.

As I tore down my walls of pride, God began to show me that He can bring me through anything.  Just when I though that I could never be saved from hurting, He healed my heart.

Healing Begins by Tenth Avenue North      So you thought you had to keep this up, all the work that you do so we think that you're good.  And you can't believe it's not enough.  All the walls you built up are just glass on the outside.  So let them fall down.  There's freedom waiting in the sound when you let your walls fall to the ground.  We're here now.  This is where the healing begins.  This is where the healing starts.  When you come to where you're broken within.  The light meets the dark.  The light meets the dark.  Afraid to let your secrets out.  Everything that you hide can come crashing through the door now.  But too scared to face all your fear, so you hide but you find that the shame won't disappear.  Sparks will fly as grace collides with the dark inside of us.  So please don't fight this coming light.  Let this blood cover us.  His blood can cover us.  

No matter what you are feeling, He knows how to heal you.  Even when you don't know what you need from Him, He is waiting for you to break down your barriers and run into His loving arms.  

Take Over

Yet again, I struggled today with my control issues.  When am I going to figure this one out?  I really do want to let God control my life; but, tragically, my own control gets in the way.  As much as I know I need Him, I can't seem to give up the control.

Psalm 31:14-16 (NIV)   But I trust in you, O LORD; I say, "You are my God."  My times are in your hands; deliver me from my enemies and from those who pursue me.  Let your face shine on your servant; save me in your unfailing love. 

Today, I found God in a very humbling way. I was at a lunch meeting for an upcoming mission trip and I had brought a salad with homemade dressing (that is scrumptious, if I do say so myself!). To make a long story short, there was a mix up and my dressing couldn't be used. A silly mistake left me frustrated and in tears as I stood in the kitchen.

Was I seriously crying over salad dressing?  No, I was crying because I was not in control. I wasn't in control of the misunderstanding and I couldn't use my control to magically conjure up more dressing . . . I even lost control of my own emotions as I cried over the sink.

I went on to let that one instance determine my mood the rest of the afternoon. I could barely hold it together as every little frustration tore me up inside. After my tears spilled over once again, a friend sat down to talk with me about it. She reminded me that Satan loves to tear us down through our weaknesses. Satan knew that this tiny instance would ruin my day and he took advantage of that. But, as always, God was there to pick up the pieces.

On the drive home, I heard the song Take Over on the radio and it was just what I needed.  The lyrics matched my heart perfectly.  It was God's way of reaching out to me right where I had fallen.  The song picked me up and it became my honest and heartfelt prayer for today.

Take Over by Aaron Shust    I tried to run, I tried to fight You.  I'm done.  I'm giving up.  I've learned to trust You, Your love.  Now I'm singing: can You take over?  Take over. Can You take over me?  I've been here over and over again, here on my knees.  I'm only closer and closer to where I want to be when You take over.  Take over.  Can You take over me?  I tried before to let go and I just hold on more.  Amazing Lord, I need the strength to let go and be Yours.  So, now I'm singing: can You take over?  Take over.  Can You take over me?  I've been here over and over again, here on my knees.  I'm only closer and closer to where I want to be when You take over.  Take over.  Can You take over me?  I surrender all I have and I surrender all I am as I remember what You've done to set me free.

Let God pick you up today.  Even though you might feel like you have fallen too far from His reach.  Just give it all up.  Give up the worries, the stress, the control - give it all to Him.  He will take over everything, especially the things you have failed at.  Let Him pick you up and He promises to save you with His love.